Splendid Mentors: Rebecca Grinnals

Today's post launches a new series called Splendid Mentors. This series features interviews with people I've personally been able to meet who have been in the wedding industry for more than 15 years.

I couldn't think of a better person to kick off the series than Rebecca Grinnals, a woman I am lucky enough to call a mentor, colleague and friend. I first became familiar with Rebecca in 2007 when she left a comment on my blog. The following year, she asked me to speak at a new conference she was launching called engage!08. I walked into the conference a bit nervous because I only knew Rebecca via email and phone at that point. I couldn't have received a warmer welcome and I was instantly struck by how incredibly down to earth and kind Rebecca was (and is). I've never been easy to impress, and I remember thinking that if the wedding industry had people like her in it who had stuck around for so long, then its future was bright. I was later a client of Rebecca's and can say without hesitation that the depth of her intelligence matches the depth of her kindness. So, without further ado, here is some of Rebecca's wisdom and insight from her 20 years in the wedding industry:

Name: Rebecca Grinnals

Company Name: Engaging Concepts Inc.

Year you first started in the wedding industry: 1991

How did you get started in the wedding industry? 
My maternal grandmother sold wedding gowns at a fancy department store in Pennsylvania. I have vivid memories of putting on my ‘white gloves and party manners,’ polishing my patent leather mary janes and getting all dressed up to get to go and visit her on the weekends. All of the ladies there treated me like a queen: they let me go back in the stockroom among all the gorgeous, frothy white gowns, I was able to sit with them at the alterations tables and touch the pearls and beads and when I was really good, I was able to sit quietly in the corner of the dressing room and watch the brides try on the dresses. On the most special of occasions, I was allowed to try on headpieces and veils and stand on the carpeted ‘box.' I was hooked! Years later, as a very young 23-year old sales manager at Walt Disney World, I was fatefully in the right place at the right time to be given the opportunity to co-found the brand new division of The Walt Disney Company, “Disney’s Fairy Tale Weddings.” The rest as they say is history and here I (still) am today!

How did working with Disney Weddings shape your insight into the wedding industry? 
Disney is an amazing company with such a rich history and iconic brand heritage. I learned so much from the intense and consistent training that they provided but just as much from the incredible people that I had the honor of working for and next to. Many are still there and have risen up the ranks as executives and others who, like me, left to strike out on their own and have done some really big things. The core values that Disney stands for will always be a big part of who I am and forever shaped me as a person and business owner.

Given a successful career at Disney, what prompted you to go out on your own and launch Engaging Concepts?
I wish I could tell you that it was this long-held dream or or some very profound answer but honestly, it was rather impulsive and more than a little risky! There was a very small window of opportunity for me to leave and receive a voluntary severance package back in 2001 when Disney was undergoing a world-wide corporate ‘re-sizing.’ They were looking to shrink voluntarily so that they did not have to lay people off in a recessionary environment. Since my husband Patrick was (and still is) a Disney Imagineer, we took a look at our benefits and ran some very rough numbers and literally made the decision overnight. Our daughter Annie had just turned one and I had the illusion (more like a delusion!) that by working for myself I would have so much more time to spend with her since I would be working from home. I certainly did gain a tremendous amount of flexibility but ten years later I can tell you that I have never worked so hard or so much as I have since becoming an entrepreneur and that says a lot coming from a company like Disney which cultivates a very strong work ethic and sets expectations extremely high. I thought that the wedding and travel industry could benefit from the experience, insight, contacts and knowledge that I had developed over my ten years with the company.

A few years ago, you launched engage!, a semi-annual conference for the luxury wedding industry. Can you let us in a little bit to your thought process behind that decision?
In the Spring of 2008, Kathryn Arce (my awesome business colleague and partner in crime) and I created engage! quite simply to be an event that we wanted to attend and that in our view did not exist. Over the years we had attended bridal event after bridal event for consumers in an attempt to connect with other like-minded wedding professionals but the events were not really developed with us in mind. We had also been a part of many of the event industry conferences out there – but they were either totally focused on one narrow segment of the market or had hundreds or even thousands of attendees and we were left wanting much more. So, we set out to create an event that attracted the best of the best wedding professionals from ALL aspects of the industry (not just certain segments) for open and honest dialogue about issues, ideas, inspiration and so much more and to have it be a luxury experience from start to finish all in an intimate and inviting setting. But really at the heart of engage! are the priceless in-person connections that result in innovative and creative new partnerships and business concepts. It has evolved, with the support of so many amazing people, into something far beyond our wildest dreams and we are thrilled, honored and excited about what the future holds!

Aside from wedding trends themselves, in what ways have you seen the industry shift during your career? 
It is more creative and connected than ever before and the innovative ideas that people are coming up with dazzles me! Both from those that have been in business for over 25 years and fresh faces – it is by far the most exciting time to be in the wedding industry!

What is your take on the increasing competition in and saturation of the industry? 
It is inevitable and not at all surprising – for the most part, the barrier to entry has never been lower in almost all segments of the industry. It is also a sexy, glamorous, pretty and fun business that gets a ton of media coverage and press, is the darling of the movie and television business and appears from the outside to be something that just about anyone can do with very little, if no training! Of course, those of us in the business know very differently but usually you don’t learn the cold, hard, exhausting realities until you have made the leap. Certainly makes for a constantly evolving marketplace that does not allow any of us to rest for one second!

What is the one thing today's businesses should keep in mind as they plan for the future? 
Service, Service, Service – it trumps the most cutting edge branding, snazziest website and over-the-top business cards every time. Those that have lasted and built real, solid, profitable businesses in this industry know that offering exceptional, proactive and authentic service at every level of the client’s interaction with their company is what keeps people coming back for more and creates raving fans. There is a big difference between talking the good service talk and walking the extraordinary service walk!

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You can follow Rebecca on Twitter here and learn more about the engage! wedding conferences here.

On Selling Yourself Short

Today I saw an online ad for a wedding-related company with the headline "The [big name designer] of [city]." I've deleted the names used not only to keep the name of the company running this ad anonymous, but also because it's something that many people do and therefore could apply to many different situations. This ad didn't really upset me; instead it saddened me. Here's why:

1. Rather than carving out their own brand, this person is literally paying to tell people that they are not as good as the other big name designer. Comparing themselves to the other designer only serves to remind readers of the ad that there is someone more qualified out there and only positions the advertiser as a knock-off.

2. Very few "big names" in the wedding industry are truly famous outside the wedding industry. Vera Wang is an exception; in fact she may be the only one. The person running the ad above has a chance to own their market for what they are offering, but instead they are introducing the brides in their city to the name of the "big name designer" that the brides hadn't yet heard of. Wedding industry fame is relative. Don't sell yourself short.

3. This person will never be someone else. Neither will you. You will never be the Preston Bailey of San Diego, the Marcy Blum of Seattle or the Colin Cowie of Chicago. You will never be those things because you are not Preston, Marcy or Colin and you do not have their story, nor do you probably want to go through what each of them went through to get to where they are. Tell your own story; don't try to live out someone else's.

If you can't sell your services or products without comparing them to a larger brand, it's time to rethink your marketing strategy. 



This post was originally published September 2010.

Splendid Ideas: Event Leadership Institute

This installment of Splendid Ideas focuses on a new company, the Event Leadership Institute, launched by industry veteran, Howard Givner. The Event Leadership Institute allows event pros to sign up for online classes on the specific topics they want to learn more about. Courses are taught by some of the best minds in the industry, including Sean Low, Jes Gordon and others. Today, Howard shares some of his insight into the event industry and more about his new venture.

Can you share a bit about your background in the event industry?
I ran a NYC-based event planning company, Paint The Town Red, for 20 years. We produced a wide range of events, including weddings, product launches, awards galas, investor meetings, etc. As we grew, we started to do more and more events overseas and started looking for a global partner to help us expand internationally. Coincidentally, in 2008 I was approached by the Global Events Group, the #1 event agency in Spain, who was looking to establish a U.S. presence, and I sold the company to them. The combined firm was the 14th largest worldwide, and won over 35 industry awards. After integrating the companies, I left at the end of 2009 to pursue other interests, which included consulting, developing the Super Planner iphone app, and now launching the Event Leadership Institute.

Why did you decide to launch the Event Leadership Institute?
The events industry has exploded in recent years, and the training and education has simply not kept pace with the demand. I’ve always been passionate about teaching, and wanted to create a vehicle to help disseminate the best practices for doing things to as many people in the industry as possible. So basically, I created the kind of resource I would have wanted available for me and my staff when I ran my event company.

How is the Event Leadership Institute different than other workshops and classes available to event professionals?
The first thing is the quality of our content, which is unmatched. For every 45 minute video class, we spend at least 7 hours helping our instructors develop their content. And I bring my 23 years of experience as a planner in helping shape each class, pushing instructors to expand in some areas, cut back in others, add charts or animations to explain complex topics, etc.

The second thing is our ease of access. Each 45 minute class is divided into around 12 chapters, each of which is a stand-alone video file, and viewers can watch them in any order they want. So if you need to know about Certificates of Insurance, you can go right to that chapter, without having to watch the rest of the class, or you can watch the rest later. The idea is to enable busy planners to get the answers they need right away so they can put them into action.

Aside from event trends themselves, in what ways have you seen the industry shift during your career?
For many years the battle was explaining the need to hire an event planner at all. It’s still a relatively new profession. That’s changed significantly, thanks in part to event planners becoming staples in movies and tv shows. Now, it’s pretty widely accepted that people hire planners for their personal or corporate events, and the battle is now to explain why they should hire you, instead of someone else.

What is your take on the increasing competition in and saturation of the industry?
This is what we all wanted, isn’t it? To have wedding & event planning become taken seriously as a profession, right? That broad acceptance dramatically expands the market of people willing to hire planners, but it also brings with it increased competition, especially since there are really no barriers to entry to being a planner. So people can complain about all the competition, but it’s not going away. Instead, professionals need to focus on differentiating themselves in the marketplace, on being smarter, more creative, and having better customer service than the competition.

What are the top three things today's businesses should keep in mind as they plan for the future?
1) Really understand your value proposition to your client, which ties into your pricing model. Businesses need to be able to clearly communicate exactly what benefits they bring to the table, why they’re of value, and how much that value is worth.

2) Have a strategic plan. If that sounds too corporate-speak, ask yourselves this: “What does success look like to you, three years from now?” Do you want to make a certain amount of money, be on tv, do celebrity events, etc.? Without knowing that you’re just spinning your wheels.

3) Listen to your clients. The things you think are important to them are not necessarily the things they’re most concerned about. The #1 reason for a really upset client in our industry is being embarrassed in front of people they care about (their boss, their clients, their family, etc.) The only way to determine what will trigger that is to really listen to them.

***

You can follow Howard on Twitter here and the Event Leadership Institute on Twitter here.

Readers of Think Splendid can access all classes at the Event Leadership Institute at a special discounted rate. You can sign up for monthly access for $20 with code 41827 or annual access for just $200 with code 41828.

Splendid Sundays Volume 62

A handful of splendid finds from around the worldwide web:

*The Knot Inc is changing their name to XO Group Inc and their new symbol on the New York Stock Exchange will be XOXO. Changes go into effect this Tuesday, June 28th.

*In a sign of the times, there's a new talent agency representing just mommy bloggers.

*Social media as a gender equalizer: can it correct the "real-life old-boys' club"?

*Google is the first Internet company to hit 1 billion unique visitors per month. Microsoft is second in popularity with 905 million uniques and Facebook is third with 714 million.

Splendid Reruns: Quick Tip for Coming Up With Blog Ideas

On Listening

One of the reasons for paying close attention to what is being said is simply that it is courteous to do so. But there is a selfish reason too . . . the way you listen has a great deal of control over the way people talk to you. Intelligent listening on your part helps the speaker to express what he has in mind and thus makes him more able to give you information you may need. How you listen therefore has a direct bearing on what you learn. -- Dr. Ralph G. Nichols

Successful People

People are just people. Famous people are just people. Wealthy people are just people. Successful people are just people. 

It's important to have mentors, and it's important to have role models, but it's important not to set people up on a pedestal. No one is better than you as a person (unless you're just a jerk, and if that's the case, then cut that out) and creating an idol out of a successful wedding professional or successful business person is a fast way to quench your creativity. Also, they'll inevitably disappoint you at some point. And if they don't, then you're probably not being objective enough in your view of them.

There is no reason that you can't be as successful or more successful than the people you look up to. There is no reason you can't be known as a trendsetter (trends are trends because someone said so; be the person who says so). There is no reason you can't be the person other people look up to. That truth is one of the hardest to accept, in both life and business, but it is also one of the most liberating.

Are you living your life in such a way that other people want to emulate or learn from YOU? And if not, why not?



Note: this post was originally published in February 2009.

App for Getting Things Done

If you need an app for getting things done, check out Ambiance. This app doesn't organize your files or keep you on a schedule, but it can help you focus by providing pleasant white noise ("Rain on Porch" is my go-to sound). I don't use it everyday, but on the days when either silence or music aren't cutting it, I turn it on. It's just enough to tune out other noise and distracting thoughts and really dig into a project. Best of all, it's available not just for the iPhone, but for Blackberry and your desktop, too.

3 Tips for Using the Twitter Favorites Button

Twitter offers you the ability to "favorite" a tweet, and the ways to use it vary. Here are a few ideas on how use the feature to make Twitter more effective for you:

1. Use the Favorites button when a tweet is literally one of your favorites.
This option is easy and probably the intent behind the button in the first place. If a tweet makes you stop and think or brings a smile to your face, mark it as a favorite to remember later. This is especially useful for tweets that make you laugh, because then if you're having a down day, you can get a quick pick-me-up just by reading through your favorites list.

2. Use the Favorites button to save links to read later. 
This tip is courtesy of Heather Crabtree at Outstanding Occasions and is great for time management: when going through your Twitter stream, if you see a tweet with a link to an article or blog post you want to read, mark it as a favorite. Later, you can sit down and read through the articles you've saved. This helps you use social media to stay in the loop while still maintaining control over the time you spend on it.

3. Use the Favorites button when someone says something nice about your company.
Whenever someone says something nice about myself or my company on Twitter, I mark it as a favorite. It's a sort of "see what others are saying" in a more casual setting. This helps track positive buzz about the company and saves those quick notes of praise that may have not made their way into a formal thank you note or email.

How do you use the Favorites button on Twitter?

Is Getting More Blog Readers the Right Goal?

People often ask me how they can get more people to read their blog. My answer is usually this: instead of focusing on getting more readers, focus on getting the right readers. Unless you run ads on your blog under a CPM model, large amounts of traffic shouldn't be your goal. Putting your efforts into building trust and reader loyalty will generate more opportunities for you down the road.

So, how do you build trust with your readers? Here are three quick tips:

1. Be very choosy about what you post on your blog. Don't blog every press release that comes across your inbox. Share information that will be useful to your readers and that you can stand behind 100%.

2. Consider your vocabulary as you write. When you loooovvve everything or everything is SO! CUTE!, people start to tune out your opinions on the subject matter because those words lose meaning and become disingenuous. If you love everything, you love nothing. If everything is special, nothing is special.

3. Show up. People like knowing what to expect, and a consistent posting schedule helps them feel comfortable with you.

What makes you loyal to a blog or blogger?



This post was originally published January 2010.

On Shaping the Future of Art

I have an original sketch by Palmer Cox. It's been in my family since 1897, the year he drew it. What strikes me whenever I look at it is that he took his "Brownies" -- a simple, whimsical idea -- and created art that not only supported himself and his family, but that shaped generations of illustrators and artists to come.

Given the popularity of his art in his day, he may have had some inkling that he was on to something big, but he could hardly have had any idea just how large an impact he would have. What you work on today has the power to literally change the way people approach their own art and work in the future. It's as simple -- and somewhat scary -- as that.

Splendid Sundays Volume 61

A handful of splendid finds from around the worldwide web:

*"If several years ago you stopped challenging yourself, you’re going to be bored . . . Do not leave before you leave. Do not lean back; lean in. Put your foot on that gas pedal and keep it there until the day you have to make a decision, and then make a decision. That’s the only way, when that day comes, you’ll even have a decision to make." (link originally shared by Chelsea Fuss)

*In Splendid Sundays Volume 38, I mentioned the "Pay What You Want" experiment that Panera Bread was launching. Here's an update on how its working out.

*"It doesn't matter what your job is, how insignificant you think it is, if you are tired and overwhelmed you are allowed to cry about it."

*Two Bright Lights did an interview with me and the first part of the interview ran two weeks ago and the second part ran this past week. In it I talk about the new wedding jobs site, social media and a little bit about why I think the way I do.

Splendid Reruns: It's Not Social Media, It's You.

Do you have any splendid finds to share?

On Innovation

Innovation always has been driven by a person or a small team that has the luxury of thinking of a new idea and pursuing it. There are no counter examples. It was true 100 years ago and it'll be true for the next 100 years. Innovation is something that comes when you're not under the gun. So it's important that, even if you don't have balance in your life, you have some time for reflection. So that you could say, "Well, maybe I'm not working on the right thing." Or, "maybe I should have this new idea." The creative parts of one's mind are not on schedule. -- Eric Schmidt, CEO at Google

How to Make Mobile Apps Work for Your Wedding Business

BRIDES just released their 2011 American Wedding Study and one of the insights included in it was that 1 in 5 brides "use a mobile app to help plan, shop for or register for their wedding." While the study didn't specify which types of apps are used, the ones that do get used include not just wedding-related apps, but also apps like Yelp, Instagram (to send photos of ideas to family and bridesmaids), etc.

The simple fact is that social media has evolved to include mobile media and if you're still worrying about whether or not to have a blog or sign up for Twitter, you're more behind the times than ever. When it comes to mobile, your site should at the very least be easily viewable on a phone. In light of the new stat from BRIDES, I'm reposting an article I wrote last year on how to make mobile apps work for your wedding business.

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The Next Big Thing In Social Media
Originally published September 14, 2010

One of the questions I am often asked about social media is "what's next"? The answer is that social media is no longer computer based and is becoming more driven by mobile technology, such as iPhones, Blackberries, Androids and other smartphones.

Frankly, the United States is a bit behind the rest of the world when it comes to getting social with mobile phones, in large part due to the affluence here. When everyone has a computer, it is easy to simply use a phone just as a phone. In countries where personal computers are a lavish expense and mobile technology is much cheaper in comparison, people have been relying on their cell phones to socialize for the past decade. In fact, in 2001, a few countries in Southeast Asia passed laws that made it legal to divorce via text message.

Fortunately, even though mobile technology as social media is nothing new, it is predominately growing in the business space and companies who jump on board now will still be in the early adopter stages. If you are considering developing a mobile app for your business, one of the most important things to keep in mind when doing so is consumer behavior.

Consider how someone in your target market uses their phone in other areas of their life. Do you often work with clients who travel frequently, either for business or leisure? One in six American travelers book their flights and hotels via their phone. For these clients, time is a highly valued commodity, and your app needs to deliver information in a way that not only saves them time, but maximizes it. Instead of reinventing the wheel, study the travel booking apps and take note of what they do well, and why using the phone rather than the laptop is beneficial to the client. What aspects of your app will benefit the client?

Are your clients foodies? What is it about the culinary apps that people are drawn to? Do you have clients who tend to work for large corporations? If so, then access to social sites on the Internet is often blocked, and many people are turning to their phones to skirt the system.

Another very important thing to keep in mind when you are developing a mobile application for your business is that it needs to do something. Vanity or "branding" apps mean nothing after the initial download to a bride or groom because they are not useful. If you are simply turning your blog into an app you are wasting your time and money. 

The reason for this goes back to consumer behavior: a bride may read 30 wedding blogs on a computer, but she is not going to download 30 different wedding apps on her phone. To do so would waste her time as the navigation methods between a computer and a phone are much different. While it is smart to design your website and blog to be compatible with mobile browsers, it does not behoove you to turn them into downloadable apps. What can you offer to brides that makes their entire planning process more useful and therefore your app (and your top of mind presence) indispensable?

Mobile technology is growing rapidly, and while it may feel a bit overwhelming, it's smart to begin strategically integrating it with your marketing now so that you're still ahead of the competition bell curve.

The Future of Facebook and Your Wedding Business

Being on Facebook is not cool anymore. The early adopters and trend-setters are moving away. But these are also exactly the type of people brand advertisers want to reach. -- Magnus Hogland

Last week, statistics were released that showed that Facebook lost 6 million U.S. based users in May 2011 alone. If you've sat in any of my classes or read my blog over the years, you know that this type of decline is something I've been predicting -- and a prediction I've been quite unpopular and openly mocked for -- for the last four years.

Here are some thoughts on why people loved Facebook and why they're now leaving and how you can still make it work for your business:

In the beginning, Facebook owned its own hill. 
If you're familiar with the 22 Immutable Laws of Marketing, then you know that in order for your brand to succeed, you have to stand for something that no one else does. You need to own your own hill. Both the Hummer and the Mini Cooper succeeded because they weren't trying to compete with mid-size sedans. Their cars are big or small and they own their respective positions with no apologies.

When Facebook started it was the anti-MySpace. MySpace was getting busy, flashy, spammy and loud. Facebook came along and was immediately different. Both companies wanted to help people to connect, but they did it in different ways. On MySpace you could show off your personality by glittering up a custom background. On Facebook, everyone got the same background across the board, a "school uniform" of sorts. Without the glitter, you could focus on what mattered: the connecting. On MySpace, everyone you knew was on there plus a ton of people you didn't know who could stalk your page whenever they felt like it (this was before MySpace implemented private pages). Facebook not only didn't allow everyone, but you had to either have a college email address or a college alum email address to join.

I joined in early 2006 with a college alum email and liked it immediately. Some of my closest friends are scattered around the world and Facebook allowed me to easily keep in touch with them and see photos of their kids, whom I am an honorary aunt to. I was able to connect with people I cared about but don't get to see often in a private online setting. What wasn't to love?

Later, Facebook introduced the newsfeed and everyone freaked out, dubbing it "stalkerbook" and accusing Facebook of taking too much of a Big Brother role in people's lives. Before on Facebook, if you wanted to find out information on someone, you had to go to each individual page to see if they had updated it. Now, all the updates came directly to you. Marketers everywhere rejoiced.

The problem was that Facebook didn't have brand fan pages at the time, so brands were creating their own personal pages under their company names, a practice that was (and still is) firmly against Facebook's terms of service. Tapping into the deep psychological need most people have to be liked, these brand managers knew that people who didn't know them would accept their friend requests anyway so as not to offend. Even though Facebook deleted (and still does) these types of pages, they can't keep up with all of them, and soon people's accounts were being littered with spam updates from these "friends."

Facebook and Consumer Behavior
Fast forward a bit to where Facebook is at now. Companies can now have their own brand profile pages, where people can "like" the page to show affinity for the brand. This past month, Facebook rolled out the ability to tag brand pages in photos rather than just people (this new feature is still in its early phases and isn't fully functional for every brand type yet). When a user "likes" a page or is tagged in a photo, it shows up on the home page feed of all of their friends. So theoretically, you just need to get a few loyal fans who "like" everything you post and your brand is suddenly in front of tens of thousands of people. On paper, this is a dream for companies everywhere; the holy grail of easy marketing.

However, and this is important, what this fails to take into account is how people relate to Facebook and why they signed up for it in the first place. Now that Facebook is open to the public, people can connect with anyone and everyone. That psychological need to be liked and not offend people is still very much in play, so people are now "friends" with people they've never met. Met someone in passing at a networking event? Now they're friends with you on Facebook and have access to every photo and update that your grandmother and college roommates post to your wall. Yes, you can limit what they see, but the fundamental flaw in the design of Facebook's privacy settings is that the people with limited access know that you are limiting them. Telling someone they're on your b-list (or c-list or d-list) of friends is a social faux pas most people aren't willing to make.

To remedy the home page overload (mafia farmers spinning dreidels around Christmas trees) and blurring of boundaries Facebook has introduced, people now have the option to "hide" updates. Guess who they're hiding updates from? People they barely know but added in order to keep the peace and companies that they "liked" but don't care to see updates from every time they log in.

Yes, new studies show that many young people check Facebook on their phone when they first wake up, but they're not checking out brands before that first cup of coffee. They're seeing who broke up (or hooked up) with who, who heard back from the new job they've been waiting on, and other juicy bits of gossip. They're not rolling over, grabbing their iphone and saying "wow, I wonder what Sally Anne Wedding Planner has to say today." Remember, they've opted to hide most brand updates on their home page.

Another very important thing to keep in mind with Facebook is that giving someone or a company a "like" for their status update is a throwaway gesture. Run a contest on your page, and you'll get a bunch of likes, but most will hide your updates later. People want the giveaway, they don't want your spam. People will also give you the thumbs up because they think "that's a cool idea" or "yes, that's my friend and I'll give her a like to show my support" while scrolling through their page, but they aren't likely to engage with your page later.

Google and where Facebook lost its soul. 
In my opinion, this mass exodus from Facebook is only going to continue and it's been a long time coming. Facebook's slippery slope began when it strayed from its core and seemingly decided that it wanted to take over the world. Facebook was the king when it came to connecting. Then they wanted everyone to use them the way they use Google. Not an impossible goal, but an unlikely one.

People do not use Facebook to search for something that's not on Facebook. Bing's results (and really, when was the last time anyone got excited about Bing?) may show at the bottom of the page, but people searching for something on Facebook are generally searching for something ON Facebook, not on the outside web. This means that when a bride or groom first gets engaged, they aren't turning to Facebook first to find ideas and vendors; they're turning to Google.

Google's been hinting at rolling out a wedding search engine for a long time now (that's for another post), and when they do, which do you think is going to show up first? Your blog or website or your Facebook business page? Add to that a growing rivalry when you consider that a month ago Facebook faced a public scandal when they were outed for trying to launch a pricey secret smear campaign against Google and which sites do you think Google will give preference to?

So, is Facebook just a big waste of time or does it still have some redeeming qualities?
Facebook isn't a complete waste of time, but if you are a wedding professional using it as your primary marketing vehicle, you are wasting your time.

If you take anything away from this post, let it be this: Facebook can be a fantastic platform for a company or brand to CONTINUE a conversation, but it is not an ideal platform for a brand to START a conversation.

If you are a photographer or cinematographer, you have a huge advantage when it comes to Facebook marketing. While you get the photos you need to tell the story of the wedding day, consider having a second or third shooter take flattering photos of all the guests at the reception. The reason? Everyone loves great photos of themselves. Detail shots are great for blog editorial features, but no one is tagging photos of a to-die-for napkin fold on Facebook. Upload flattering shots of real people from the weddings, watermark the photo with your website and allow everyone who attended the wedding to tag themselves in it.

For all types of wedding professionals: Facebook should be used to drive traffic to a platform you own: your website or your blog. These are platforms where people can subscribe via RSS, sign up for your newsletter and most importantly: where they know they can always find you regardless of other social media trends. If people continue to leave Facebook or if it decides to shut its doors next month, you'll have a home base established where people are already tuned in and an organic database filled with people who have given you permission to contact them. You may have 5000 fans on Facebook, but if your page is gone tomorrow, only a very small handful of those people are going to take the time to Google you and find where else you're at online.

So if the people I want to reach are leaving Facebook, what's the next big thing in social media?
I don't have a crystal ball, so I can't say for sure what types of social media platforms are going to be the next big thing. However, here are two things to look at when evaluating the long-term potential of a hot new online platform:

1. Look at its core, look at its core, look at its core. What is the platform about? Connecting people? Giving them 15 minutes of fame? Making a big splash and flipping quickly for a big payout? And most importantly, is it sticking to that core or straying from it? The social media platforms that will succeed for the longest are the ones that focus on common psychological needs: the need to be loved, seen, affirmed, etc.

2. Look at consumer behavior. It doesn't really matter how you want people to use something, is it how they really use it? Photos are still big on Facebook because they feed both the psychological need to be seen and because at its core, Facebook was about sharing and connecting over life's moments. When it comes to posting and sharing photos, the behavior of their users still honors those two things.

Facebook isn't dead, but it certainly isn't the place to be primarily focused on when it comes to marketing your wedding business. In my opinion, they strayed from their core in the quest for "more" and lost the magic of why people liked them in the first place. Creating a dynamic platform such as a website or blog is difficult work -- much more difficult than creating a Facebook page -- but it is work that will pay off the most for you in the social media space in the long-run.

Splendid Sundays Volume 60

A handful of splendid finds from around the worldwide web:

*How to block Facebook's new automatic face recognition tagging and tighten other privacy settings.

*Still not convinced that bloggers are becoming more influential? Fashion blogger Sasha Wilkins has been tapped to be the new face of the Hunter brand, including their famous wellies.

*Collaboration is risky. Now, get on with it.

*I missed these originally while at Engage!11, but still worth a read over a week later: a somewhat cynical article on The Thriving (Online) Shelter Magazine Industry and a response to the article from Grace at Design*Sponge.

Splendid Reruns: Jealousy, Apathy, and Celebrating Milestones

Do you have any splendid finds to share?

Style Me Pretty on CBS Sunday Morning

Abby Larson of Style Me Pretty (left) with Rita Braver of CBS Sunday Morning.

Normally I would save this type of update for Splendid Sundays, but since this is happening tomorrow morning, I wanted to let you know now so you don't miss the chance to tune in:

CBS Sunday Morning is doing a piece on the rising influence of bloggers in the media and publication industries, and Style Me Pretty will be featured as the representative for the bloggers in the wedding industry. Rita Braver and her crew visited Boston a few weeks ago to interview Abby Larson and her staff at Style Me Pretty on the ins and outs of running a wedding blog as a business.

I've been tracking the influence of online publications in other sectors closely as those business trends will have a similar impact on the wedding industry. It's fascinating to watch both consumer buying patterns shift and business marketing patterns follow suit in order to keep up with the changes in customer behavior. The bridal industry is no exception, and in my opinion should take more of a leadership role in this type of shift since our target demographic is generally younger, and I'm thrilled that it's being included in this story on CBS.

You can find out what time the show airs in your area here.



Photo via Style Me Pretty

On Vision

We are stubborn on vision. We are flexible on details . . . A big piece of the story we tell ourselves about who we are, is that we are willing to invent. We are willing to think long-term. We start with the customer and work backwards. And, very importantly, we are willing to be misunderstood for long periods of time. -- Jeff Bezos

Introducing the Wedding Blog Directory

Submitting your work to wedding blogs is one of the best ways to get online exposure for your business, but figuring out what each blog looks for and keeping it all organized can be quite an ordeal. With this in mind, I've created the wedding blog directory, a place with all the information on how to submit to some of the most influential bridal blogs all in once place and right at your fingertips.

Kristy Rice of Momental Designs created the above sketch for the wedding blog directory. I chose five bloggers whom I feel represent a good cross-section of the professional wedding blog industry. The truth is I could have chosen so many more. This segment of the wedding industry has really taken off in the past several years and is shaping how couples consume bridal information and inspiration and how they make their purchase decisions. Wedding blogs represent an exciting shift in our industry, and we're still in the very young stages of the opportunities online publishing and marketing present.

You can check out the wedding blog directory here.

5 Reasons Your Ads Aren't Working

I believe that advertising isn't dead, and that it can still be very effective if done right. The problem is that many people rely on the ad alone when in fact it is just one layer of many in a strategic marketing campaign. If you're seeing little to no return on investment for your ad dollars, here are some things to consider:

Does the place you're advertising reach your target client?
Seems like a no-brainer, but I am always surprised when I hear high-end wedding professionals complain that their ad on a site or in a magazine that targets the mass market with a lower budget spend didn't work. It's not that those sites or magazines don't work, it's that you may be too expensive for their readers. Choose an advertising platform that reaches the client you want.

What does your ad look like?
If your ad uses low-res photos and is pixelated or uses outdated fonts like Scriptina, you're doing yourself a disservice. Consider working with a professional graphic designer to create your ads. A tip from Susan Moynihan from the Engage!11 media panel last week: use your ad to push the envelope and inspire, much like fashion ads do.

Is your website accessible anywhere?
If a bride or groom is inspired by your ad, but can't access your website on their phone because it's in flash, they are going to move on to the next company on their list. May seem unfair, but that's the way Generations X (the tail-end years), Y (more commonly known as Millennials) and Z (who will start to get married within the next ten years) consume information and shop. Trying to fight the generational consumer habits of your target clients is a losing battle.

What does your online presence say about you?
When was the last time you updated your blog? The galleries on your website? Are you using social media to complain or solely brag about yourself all the time? Do you talk about clients in an unflattering way online? All of these things can build or break trust with potential clients. Your ad may have piqued someone's interest, but your online habits may have turned them away.

What is your followup protocol?
It's not the fault of the website or magazine you advertised with if you can't return emails or phone calls. As I mentioned earlier, today's couples are an instant gratification generation. If they can't reach you in a timeframe that matters to them (not to you), they're moving on.

Engage!11 Recap :: Part 2

Kathryn Arce and Rebecca Grinnals, the brains behind the Engage! conferences. Photo by Jessica Claire.

One of the things I love the most about Engage!11, and all of the Engage! conferences, is that they are a true snapshot of where the luxury wedding industry is at. Rebecca and Kathryn don't build the conference around a topical theme and they don't tell each speaker that they need to touch on the theme of "revolutionizing weddings" or "weddings making a comeback" or anything like that. This means that any themes that emerge during each Engage! are organic and represent what the wedding professionals working in this segment of the industry really are seeing and dealing with.

Sylvia Weinstock learning about the Earth Harp. Photo by Jessica Claire

As usual with this semi-annual conference, there were a few themes that stuck out to me this year. I'll cover a few in another recap post, but today I wanted to focus on one specific thread that appeared numerous times throughout the sessions and conversations: the art of story telling.

I was personally thrilled that story telling emerged as a prominent theme because it has been one of the core values of Splendid Communications since the very beginning. In fact, there are over 95 posts on Think Splendid that talk about story telling. At its very center, this company is about helping others figure out how to tell their story in a way that allows them to continue living their stories and put food on their tables. The Splendid mantra is "social media is a return to old-fashioned conversations rather than a race to keep up with the next big thing" and old-fashioned conversations center around stories. Who are you? What kind of legacy are you leaving? Why do you think the way you do? How can sharing that story translate to a profitable business?

David Beahm during the opening sessions. Photo by Jessica Claire.

In his opening session, David Beahm remarked that we in the wedding industry have the power to create memories for people that they'll never forget. Weddings fascinate the psychologist in me because they are human nature cranked up to eleven. Thousands of interconnected stories all in the same room, all influential to the bride or groom in some way. We have a rare opportunity to help a couple tell not just their story, but also to help celebrate the stories of all the people in the room who helped shaped the bride or groom into the person the other fell in love with.

Todd Fiscus grew a $15 million event design business in less than nine years. Photo by Mel & Co.

Rebecca Grinnals, Cindy Novotny, and Todd Fiscus talked about running your business in a way that honors both your story and the client's story. What does the way you answer your phone or use social media say about you? How does your process communicate competence to your clients? How does the rest of the world see that you care about each client as an individual?

Marcy Blum has been creating celebrity weddings for over 25 years. Photo by Mel & Co.

Marcy Blum talked about creating environments that help your clients' stories be celebrated in a way that touches both the couple and the guests.

Part of the media panel: Marilyn Oliveira, Susan Moynihan, Christy Weber, Angela Desveaux. Photo by Mel & Co.

Michelle Rago discussed how partnering with media and press can help tell your brand's story to a much larger audience (and help keep you in business). The media panel that she moderated, Jill Meister, Marilyn Oliveira, Susan Moynihan, Christy Weber, Angela Desveaux and Abby Larson, all discussed the ways their skills and brands can best (and most literally) tell both your story and the story of the couples being featured.

Custom folders created for Engage!11 by Envelopments. Photo by Mel & Co.

I love that the art of story telling is being embraced by the wedding industry because it is what we do better than anyone else. We help create memories and tell the stories of our clients. It's trendy to think of a wedding as just another, albeit fancier, party, but it's not. Weddings are emotional and carry stories that we may never even get to hear: the story of the bride's parents who stashed away money in a wedding savings account every month since the day they learned they were having a girl. The stories of estranged families reunited for one weekend because they are celebrating their love for the bride or groom. The stories of the maid of honor who stuck by the bride's side through every story that didn't quite work out before she met "the one." Every wedding has thousands of stories, some spoken and some quiet, and we are lucky because we get the privilege of helping people celebrate them.

You, Amplified

Social media doesn't make your company better or worse, it amplifies what you already are.

If you have a positive outlook on life, it shows. If you complain all the time, it shows.

If you're flexible and roll with the punches, clients and colleagues can see that. If you're boring and have a mediocre business, that shows, too.

If you've built a business through manipulation, unethical practices and lying, then you'll find it easy - too easy - to use social media to lie to a larger audience.

Who are you and how is your story being told to the world?



This post was originally published in December 2009.

Engage!11 Recap :: Part 1

I am still processing Engage!11, the business conference for companies working with the luxury bridal industry, that took place at The Grand Del Mar in San Diego last week. I'll share more of my thoughts and insights from the conference later this week, but here are two videos from Bruce Patterson at Cloud Nine Creative to give you a glimpse into the amazing event that Rebecca Grinnals and Kathryn Arce produce twice each year (this Engage! was their seventh in the series).

Engage 11: Grand Del Mar // Day 1 from Cloud Nine Creative on Vimeo.

Engage 11: Grand Del Mar // Wrap Film from Cloud Nine Creative on Vimeo.

To give you a taste of how talented Bruce and his team are, the second video was shown to the entire room about twenty minutes after the dancing scenes at the gala were filmed. If you need a cinematographer who is amazing at same day edits, Cloud Nine Creative is your team.

Also, Engage!11 :: The Grand Del Mar sold out in just two tweets and had a waiting list of over 125 people, so if you're considering attending Engage!11 :: Cayman Islands in November, I'd recommend signing up sooner rather than later.

Splendid Sundays Volume 59

A handful of splendid finds from around the worldwide web:

*"Social media is proving to be one of the most beneficial ways for luxury brands to become noticed and to move product."

*In a nod to the rising influence of bloggers, MAC Cosmetics has invited a group of beauty bloggers to design a signature collection of Lipglass and eye shadow.

*WedLuxe, Canada's luxury wedding magazine, announced at Engage!11 this past week that they will be launching a U.S. edition soon.

*The talented Kelly Ashworth has released free monthly desktop calendars and designs for your computer and iphones.

A Splendid Rerun: Four Tips for Creating a Better Wedding Blog

Do you have any splendid finds to share?

On Possibility

Don’t be trapped by the dogma of other people’s thinking. -- Steve Jobs