Relationships

Who You Are, Now

One of the best gifts we can give in conversation when reintroduced to people we've lost touch with is, “Tell me who you are now.”

None of us are the same person we used to be. We set New Year's Resolutions with this very goal in mind, putting hope in our potential to do and be better. All of us have grown and changed, having been shaped by the experiences that come with turning another year – or several years – older.

If you’re still defining someone by mistakes they made years ago, chances are they’re still defining you by yours as well.

If you haven’t seen someone for a while and your paths cross, allow yourself the gift of being the first to extend the benefit of the doubt.
 


Originally published January 2015

Celebrating Success

Assuming everyone has an ulterior motive is a toxic way to live.

Sure, some people do. Others, however, truly want to see what's best for you happen. They often want to contribute to your success out of a belief that a rising tide raises all ships.

If the people in your life seem to only get excited when others fail, if they're all too eager to gossip about someone any time something negative happens, if they intentionally feed discord based on assumptions, then give yourself some space. Find and surround yourself with people who not only celebrate the success of others but who also help work to make it happen.

More importantly, be that person.
 


Originally published July 2014

What Collaborating With Passionate People Requires

Passionate people — people who want to see the world changed into a better place for themselves, their children and for others — often don't fit the status quo. Because of this, passionate people are often misunderstood. They're often accused of having malicious or self-serving ulterior motives when in reality there are none. 

Surrounding yourself with passionate people means you will have to work harder on your relationships. It means taking the time to understand what drives them. It means asking better questions. It means less assuming and deeper listening on your part.

This investment of time and energy is worth it.
 


Originally published June 2014